Dan Patrick Bingo

I’m eager to watch the April 15th debate on immigration in Texas between Mayor Julián Castro and Senator Dan Patrick. So eager, in fact, that I thought I’d familiarize myself with Patrick’s views on immigration.

The man stays on point. He doesn’t say much, but what he does say, he says over and over again. Reading it all made me feel like I should be keeping score of how many times he said certain things.

Naturally, my thoughts turned to drinking games. There is a tradition, after all, of associating drinking games with major political speeches.

Y’all need to trust me on this: given how often Dan Patrick repeats himself, recommending a drink every time he says X would be hazardous to the health of most of the population.

I came up with a game you can play without risking alcohol poisoning.

Allow me to present Dan Patrick Immigration Debate Bingo.

Dan Patrick Immigration Debate Bingo  click this link to download your own set of cards and play along at home! All you need are a few pennies or peanuts to use as markers for your cards, and the ability to listen to Dan Patrick without throwing things at the screen hard enough to break it.

You can go for straight bingo, which is five in a row vertically, horizontally, or diagonally. You might consider variations like the Texas T (the top row across and the middle row down), or I for Immigration (Texas T with the bottom row across as well).

Of course, you do face a challenge with the free space on these cards, because the fact is, with the way the laws are now, some people just can’t win. If you think that’s frustrating in bingo, try dealing with it in your life.

A few disclaimers:

  • Immigration is a very serious issue that Texas and our country must address in a serious, thoughtful way very soon if we want to live up to the promise and possibilities that our future holds.
  • Some people might not have certain types of government paperwork, but no human is illegal, and all people deserve to be treated with respect and dignity.
  • For information on groups doing incredible work to move our debate forward, check out United We Dream, watch the Race & Immigration section of the Texas Tribuneand monitor hashtags like #2million2many and #not1more on Twitter.
  • I took almost all of the phrases on the bingo cards from Patrick’s speeches, bills, videos, tweets, and Facebook posts. A few are thrown in that come up often in immigration debates but aren’t ones I can document him using – if I used ALL quotes from him, every card would be a winner. You can likely guess which ones aren’t his. [Hint: they will be the only spaces uncovered by the end of the debate.]
  • If you are offended by this, you don’t have to play.

The debate will start at 6 p.m. and be live-streamed on the Texas Tribune and Univision 41 (the San Antonio affiliate) websites. It will be broadcast on Univision stations in Texas later in the evening.

Download the bingo cards, print them out, tune into the live stream, and use them as you wish.

More importantly, however, learn about the complex issues facing immigrants. Reflect upon the fact that we are a nation of immigrants, and that is what has made us strong. Reflect upon the fact that some candidates want to put up the sign that says we’re full – no more room, while others want to find ways to be better neighbors and stewards of the great promise of the American dream, that if you are willing to work hard, you can make a better world for yourself here, no matter who you are or where you came from or how you arrived.

Reflect, and then get ready to vote in November. Because while bingo is a game, immigration policy should not be.

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